Think my Edge is electronically possessed... lol

[heatherhb21]

I have a 11' Limited Edge, owned it for a year in January and well I've had alot of issues... You put it in park and turned it off and it wouldn't turn off because the left display said "shift to park" got that fixed and now it's basically possessed. The cd eject touch button, a/c - don't work at all and, climate on, drivers temp down - don't work half the time. The car will not start if it is cold out left display says "no key detected" yet the key opens the doors and I have to use them to remote start the car otherwise I'd be stuck, it will turn the fm radio on when im listening to sirius and never touched it, just drive down the road and it will change itself and big one my brake assist warning goes off when there is noone infront of me and noone beside me. A vehicle can be over 2 18 wheelers ahead of me and it will go off when I'm not even giving it gas. And, a small thing my drivers windshield wiper never works and the dealership has apparently replaced it 3 times already but if it rains I'm basically blind because it's like a pattern on my window. Im no mechanic but everything except the wiper has to be connected computer/electronically and, no clue why it's all going haywire.. any ideas?

 

I just dropped it off at the dealership so we will see what they say but just wondered if anyone had like issues.

[enigma-2]

Ahhh, you got Edge demons. There used to be a preacher on TV that could pull the cooties out of poop. Seen him heal a young boy, blind since birth. He was short, fat and had no neck. Think his name was Earnst Anglie (or something like that). Bet he could have got those demons to leave.

 

Hope they find it and a simple problem.